AMAZING

It's amazing, I'm the reason
Everybody fired up this evening
I'm exhausted, barely breathing
Holding on to what I believe in

TETSUO (LAIKIN)

I read about this fable type shit called the fisher king. He had some kind of perpetual wound that couldn't be healed. That's kind of how I feel since my mom's death.

When I'm out in the clubs testing my latest bangers with the crowds, I see them pulsing to the beat but all I can think about is my mother's diseased heart when it finally gave up on her. I sometimes get tense now feeling my own heartbeat, convinced somehow it's me that's gonna end up expiring in a similar fashion to her.

Maybe that's why I keep pushing these beats so hard. I'm testing myself and my own fear of going out of this world just like she did.

Like mother, like son.

Anxiety with global fame is a real killer. You're already high on this tight rope then you get all fucked up, which in turn threatens to bring down all you've created and worked hard for.

The only thing that calms down these anxiety demons is finding the right girl to help me through those long sleepless nights. But finding her is something else altogether. And in the search for the right one, I keep breaking hearts along the way and only give a small part of myself to each one I pass by. I have to, otherwise I won't exist anymore.

Maybe I'm a vampire, only it's not blood I'm needing but emotional empathy.

AMULYA

I caught sight of him at the back of the club before he retreated to his private booth.

It was hard not to notice him with his infra red T2 style sunglasses on and emanating a heavy brooding energy like that of a skulking predator.

I'm not saying he's not a gentleman but he just has this vibe that screams he needs to own your soul rather than just bother with small talk and a quick fuck. Although it could be both with him - either way I plan to find out.

My entourage is with me tonight and I feel a bit like Marlon Brando in the Godfather. I got more consiglieres than I can shake a stick at. Maybe too many. Everyone has an opinion on how I should approach him. Some think I should steer clear of him altogether telling me he's trouble; others think I should engage with him directly and make my mark on him.

I've been accused of being like a big game hunter of men's hearts, constantly seeking one more complex and magnificent than the one before.

I might smash the glass ceiling with Tetsuo though.

SABAH

I got a couple of friends who work the clubs in L.A and will send me a text if they know Tetsuo is gonna arriving at their place.

I'd recently been given a promotion at work and was overseeing the night shift crew when I got the text.

"He's here."

That was all I needed to walk out of the job I'd been in for the last eighteen months. Ever since I was little I've always been impulsve like that. Some think it's my biggest weakness.

I think it's my greatest strength.

Turning up at the club, I try and act cool like I haven't just been getting a sun tan from watching over deep fat fryers.

It's hard to make your presence felt when you know you're a nobody.

But I just know I got to meet my hero again.

I order a drink but I really have no idea what the hell I'm doing. It's a good test though. Can I make my presence felt by just standing here. I keep hearing from friends about the law of attraction. Maybe I'll attract Tetsuo just standing here, holding this crazy exotic cocktail thing I just ordered.

TETSUO (LAIKIN)

It's hard being anonymous when you're the most famous man in America. Sometimes I get paranoid thinking just how many random people here in the club right now are trying to get close to me.

It's like they're celebrity assassins, looking to shoot me, not with guns but with cameras, getting their moment of immortality by taking a selfie, like I'm some sort of rare, encaged zoo animal.

I don't tend to let people into my inner circle until I had them been checked out by security.

But there's a girl over there got me willing to take a chance on my own personal security.

She may be a psycho but sometimes you just got to take a chance.

Genius lies in taking risks, not just in art but in love.

The question is: do I wait for her to make the first move or do I?

Let's see.