5 min read

STARFISH AND COFFEE

If you set your mind free, baby
Maybe you'd understand
Starfish and coffee
Maple syrup and jam

All her friends loved Michael Jackson, but she loved Prince. Hannah wasn't ashamed to admit a natural sense of superiority about her preference either. MJ was mainstream in a way that Prince wasn't. It seemed from the select few others who agreed with her (all coincidentally in her art elective) that Prince was the creative's choice. He just had that mercurial Beatles type of ability to switch from one style to the next without it seeing contrived that appealed to the right brained side of her thinking.

Forming a break time choir with her motley crew of fellow Prince lovers, the outsiders sang their favourite songs with complex harmonies by the back of the bike shed where annoying smoochy couples preferred to practice their french kissing instead. 'The Raspberry Berets' (as they called themselves) took no notice as they sang cover versions of "Where Doves Cry", "I Would Die 4 U" and their favourite "Starfish And Coffee" to their heart's content. It never even occurred to them that they were all woefully out of tune and out of time with each other as they sang their loving tributes to their hero with great gusto.

"You sound like cats being strangled in slow motion," one vindictive MJ fan called Ross from B2 shouted at them as they sang a painfully slow version of 'Purple Rain' one Monday morning.

"You're just jealous because we've actually got taste and you wear that pervy MJ glove."

"MJ ain't a pervert. Prince is, though. Didn't you know that he had his ribs removed so he could suck his own dick."

Hannah laughed at the implausible rumour but Vicki wasn't having any of it. She threw a lunging punch at Ross as he fell backwards and hit his head on the ground.

"You lot are mental! No wonder you all like Prince. I'm telling Mrs Clark what you done."

Needless to say, as a consequence of this impetuous moment of playground violence, 'The Raspberry Berets" were summoned to explain themselves to Mrs Clark, the headmistress of the school where they all attended.

Luckily for Vicki, Ross's injuries were minor and Mrs Clark held back on suspending her but instead warned the trio of girls to no longer sing at break times or congregrate in any fashion as a group outside of the classroom.

The girls were incensed by this decision as they felt it was grossly unfair.

"She's probably an MJ fan too," Hannah said under her breath as they walked out of her office. Nevertheless, they accepted their collective punishment and agreed to keep their love for Prince to themselves.

At least for now.


Hearing about the drama of her art students, Miss Poole  (also a Prince fan) decided to cheer the 'Berets' up and set the girls their very own art project where she challenged them to each draw a portrait of 'The Purple One' with a mystery prize to be revealed at the end of the friendly competition.

"Don't fall out over this. I'm sure you'll all do brilliantly with it."

The trio set to work on their portrait tributes and worked in such silence in the art room that you could have been mistaken for thinking it was a church, so focused was their commitment to the task.

Hannah spent the rest of the week working on her portrait at home in the evenings. Listening to her favourite Prince album 'Sign "O" The Times' on repeat through her Walkman she finally completed her drawing by adding a subtle purple starfish motif over her most accurate portrait of her idol. As soon as she added this particular detail she felt certain she would win. It was her confidence she believed she shared with Prince himself which might also be called genius. He'd inspired that in her.


A week later the three girls handed their work concealed in plastic folders to Miss Poole who was curious to see what they had all come up with.

The anticipation of finding out who had won was almost unbearable; the three girls had previously agreed between themselves not to fall out when the winner was finally announced.

"Alright. Firstly I just want to say all three portraits are worthy winners so it was impossible to choose. However, I do think that Hannah's addition of the starfishes was inspired so I am going to award her first prize with Vicki and Amy tied in second place."

Hannah was good at concealing her natural arrogance so nodded in modest fashion so as not to annoy her fellow 'Berets'.

"And now for the prize which I will present to you, Hannah, on one proviso."

"What's a proviso?"

"A condition that goes with a deal."

"Okay."

"Actually two provisos. The first is that you don't scream too loud. And the second is you have to give me part of it."

Amy scrunched up her face at the idea of sharing a prize with anyone, but Hannah was intrigued.

"Okay. I agree to your, provisos was it?"

At which point, Miss Poole stepped forward and handed Hannah a white envelope which she promptly opened with twenty gold stars falling out from it onto the floor.

"That's just for effect," Miss Poole explained.

Then as she slid the actual content of what was inside Hannah very nearly almost let out a scream but remembered what she had agreed.

"Oh wow!"

Vicki tried to sneak a peak as to what it was.

"What is it?"

But Hannah was genuinely speechless so handed the prizes to Vicki who nearly screamed too but decided to cry instead.

"Oh my God! You're so lucky!"

"Remember what I said about sharing part of it with me, Hannah?"

Sniffing profusely whilst wiping away her own tears, Hannah nodded again.

"Well, if you count the tickets you'll see there's four exactly, so we can all go, provided you stick to your side of the bargain. The way I see it. Us Prince fans have go to stick together. Don't ask me how how I've managed to justify it as an extension of your elective time on Thursday but I have. Of course, it goes without saying I'll need your parents consent to you all coming with me but if we can get past that minor hurdle then we'll all be seeing Prince at Wembley...

... and whatever you do. Don't tell Ross!"

Postscript

Miss Poole got suspended from her teaching post for dishonestly using school funds to pay for a non-curricular trip outside of school time. However, the four of them had an amazing time at the concert which they would remember long after the drama had dissipated.

They believed, rightly or wrongly, that Michael Jackson never incurred such eccentric devotion as theirs for Prince. They were surely testimony to this fact.

As for Ross, he continued to sleep with his curled up MJ glove under his pillow until he left home. He never did manage to prove if Prince removing his ribs was true or false. Naturally, in his allegiance to Michael, he preferred to believe it was true.