I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND

It's the handhold that's got the entire world of boxing talking i.e was it consensual or a subtle violation? Certainly, not since watching 2005's 'Pride and Prejudice' with Mr Darcey and Elizabeth Bennett has the touching of a pair of hands been so compelling.

Only veteran fight promoter, Frank Warren, will ever know the truth about his hand being 'forcibly' held by Turki Al Sheikh during the walk out to the Anthony Joshua vs Francis Ngannou fight at the Riyadh Kingdom Arena back in March. Does the North London boxing promoter wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, cursing his fleshy submission to the much smaller man's grasping hand, I wonder? Is this the price that he had to pay to do business with the Sheikh with as much money at his disposal as sand in the Arabian desert.

Ever since the Saudis have been staging mega fight events for their Riyadh Season, it appears that a proverbial 'brain drain' of the UK's top flight boxers has been taking place as rival British promoters (previously at each other's throats) have been miraculously turned into the best of friends by the sheer allure of glittering carats of gold dangled before them like carrots.

It's now all just one big love fest between the once bitterest of rivals in Britain as it seems Saudi oil money really does make the boxing world go round.

The sheikh's two favoured promoters (at least for now) are the elder Frank Warren (72 years old) and the younger Eddie Hearn (44 years old). These two actively avoided each other for fifteen years prior to the Saudis taking an active interest in the sport of boxing and so it's a little galling to see them now cosy up to each other like best buds knowing they could have done this so many years ago and made many of the marquee fights that boxing fans desperately wanted.

Better late than never, I suppose and for those of us who enjoy boxing we get to see mega events staged between the biggest fighters in the world in stadiums devoid of atmosphere and where rich Arabs (wearing dark glasses) watch the combat before them like they're terminally catatonic - perhaps they're sleeping?

But more compelling than the fights themselves is the strange body language between Turki Al Sheikh and Frank Warren who has been led on a few occasions now by his pay master's hand like a poodle - a perfect, if a somewhat literal metaphor.

What is even more fascinating is how Eddie Hearn has somehow managed to avoid having his hook held by his Sugar (should that be sand) Daddy. In the photo (see above) he has his hands firmly wedged in his pockets as if he's attempting to burrow a tunnel to Australia through his cream-coloured trousers. If there's an example of his persuasion genius then it must surely be this - avoiding having his hand held for a photo op like an awkward child being told to sit in a certain way for a family photo. It's not Eddie Hearn that has to deal with the speculation about what this hand holding means, it's Frank Warren - who was famously once shot with a 9mm bullet and nearly died from the injury that narrowly missed his heart. Whatever cachet Warren had from his tough guy, 'Brick Top' image in the streets of London has now been squandered by the Sheikh who has clearly no interest in upholding any pretence of machismo with his new best friend.

Of course, it's true that in Saudi, men holding hands is a sign of solidarity, kinship and respect. Perhaps, then, in this cultural transition period where we hand over our sports to the House of Saud like luxury hostages, we'll have to honour these traditions regardless of our national predilection for playground sniggering at such optics.

For although in the year 2024, we may pride ourselves in Britain on being progressive with regards to gay rights and morally superior to Saudi where homosexuality is still severely punished, we clearly can't quite handle this business of hand holding quite so maturely.

Maybe, in years to come, Warren's willingness to press flesh with the Sheikh will be seen as a landmark moment in Middle East diplomacy and he'll be hailed for his unflinching heroism in a sport not known for its social nuance.

However, I think the true breakthrough will come when Eddie Hearn finally relents and takes his hands out of his pockets for his Arab paymaster.

We're waiting, Eddie!