WHEN YOUR LOVER HAS GONE

When he was in love, the external world around him dissolved to nothing and all that was left was the private one he shared with Audrey. But when love deserted him, he was brought abruptly back to the world at large, including sidewalks and skyscrapers and felt utterly lost, no longer able to feel good about life and work.

That first morning back at the office was especially heavy for Howard and as he sunk into his executive leather chair he felt as if he just wanted the floor beneath him to open up and suck him under all thirty floors, burying him deep amongst the rubble of the building's foundations.

Time slowed down so much throughout the long day Howard even wondered if one of his staff had messed around with all the clocks as a practical joke. Why was it that time always speeded up when you were with the woman you loved but slowed down to the opposite degree as as soon as she'd gone.

"Hey Nancy! Is there something wrong with the clocks? They seem to be running slow."

His secretary checked her own wrist watch with the one above the door of Howard's office just to make sure everything was synchronised.

"They're keeping perfect time as far as I can tell."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Nancy noticed her boss was not looking so great.

"You okay?" she asked, certain it was a dumb question.

"I'm about to throw myself out of the window."

Uncertain how to respond to his seemingly sincere statement, she responded the only way she knew how.

"Maybe I should close the window then."

Somehow, the unintentionally comic reply made Howard laugh. God knows he needed that.

"Thanks, Nancy. I just remembered why I hired you."

His personal secretary wasn't quite sure if he was being ironic, but accepted the compliment regardless.

"Thank you, Mr Stevens. I appreciate that."

Leaving the office at three, Howard went in search of a downtown bar where he could be sure no-0ne would recognise him. He hated being seen at a time of weakness.

The way he saw a bar was like returning to the warmth of the womb and instead of being kept alive by the oxygen, glucose and nutrients being channeled through the placenta, he was kept alive by bourbon, orange zest and ice served in a tumbler.

Arriving at some run down looking place calling itself 'After Hours' mid afternoon, Howard felt sleazy, if justifiably so. Once your heart's been broken, all bets are off when it comes to conventional drinking hour rules.

The first thing he noticed upon arriving in the dimly lit joint was the Frank Sinatra playing in the background. It was his favourite album of all time - 'In The Wee Small Hours' and it felt like an old friend had joined him in his hour of need.

"What you'll have, mister?" asked the assertive bartender who appeared to have a slight Polish accent.

"Tell you what, Jack. I might try something a little different today."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. We're gonna invent a new cocktail."

"Okay. I'm always up for a challenge. Are you celebrating something, mister?"

Howard shook his head.

"I'm mourning the death of a love affair."

Stroking his impressive jaw line, the bartender went to work.

"The death of a love affair eh? We're gonna need some Vodka to start with. Polmos Spirytus Rektyfikowany to be precise. You good with that?"

The businesman nodded in approval of the bartender's opening gambit.

"You know what. Throw some whiskey in it too. She always used to bring me a whiskey whenever I had a cold."

"Alright, mister. It's all ethanol to me."

"And a cherry. She did this trick with a cherry ..."

"Hold it mister. I don't need to know everything."

"You got me all wrong. She'd eat a cherry and manage to avoid getting the little sticky out stem thingy caught in her mouth."

"Okay, I get it. I'll put a cherry in."

Searching for something else to add to the cocktail, Howard appeared to have run out of ideas.

"What else, what else? I could do with something to add some flavour in there. But nothing too sweet. This isn't the time for sweetness. Aside from the cherry, I mean."

"What about some spicy bitters? Angostura. You'll have some cloves and cinnamon in there."

Howard was happy with this and fancied they had just about enough going on in one glass for now.

"Alright then. I reckon that's about it."

Putting the finishing touches to the drink, the bartender added some mint and ice for good measure. Finally presenting it to Howard, the businessman stared at it for a moment and started to well up.

"I don't know why. Making this up with you makes me feel better. I was having the worst day."

"My pleasure, mister. I could tell you was feeling rough."

Before he took a sip, he slipped the bartender some money though he instantly declined it.

"First one is free. See what you think first. If you like it you can pay for the next one. Who knows we might even put it up on the board."

Clearly touched by the bartender's kind gesture, Howard looked down at the experimental drink before him

"Okay. Now for the serious part. What do you want to call it?"

He thought about it for a few seconds before he responded confidently.

"Audrey!"

Then hearing Frank's voice singing on the radio in the background he instantly changed his mind.

"No, wait. We'll call it 'When your Lover has Gone.'"